So you’ve been dating that attractive person for quite a while now and you hit that awkward moment… “I think I love you…question mark?” You “think” you love them? Don’t you “know” that you love them? Sometimes you only “think” you’re in love because you’re afraid of what it means to “be in love.” But more often than not, I think we are really not sure if we are in love or just really, really like them. Do we even know what love is?
Let’s scale back from the perils of dating and look at the big picture. God has called us to love everyone, not just that one person we want to spend the rest of our lives with. What does that kind of love look like? Paul has already vividly expressed our need for love in everything that we do. Now he starts to describe love.
(1)Love is patient. Wait a second, Paul. You’re telling me that it’s better to be “patient” than to be able to move mountains? Well, from a high-level view, who were Jesus’ true followers? Was it the people He did miracles for or the people that He provided the most basic needs? Love is most commonly displayed in the simplest of ways. The key is that these aren’t one time events but a continual and unchanging attitude toward someone. The way I’ve seen patience recently is not in the ability to wait (although that is part of it), but the ability to persevere. Have you ever asked someone you know to come with you to church and they’ve turned you down? Was your immediate thought, “Well, God, that was their chance. I don’t have to ask them any more.” Do you think that’s patiently persevering? Taking this to the next level is having patience with people that don’t have the patience for you. Have you ever asked that guy to church that makes fun of organized religion? One of the highest forms of patience I see in the Bible is when Jesus is being crucified and He says, “Forgive them God!” (paraphrased from Luke 23:34) Now that’s holding out for hope on a lost cause. Don’t think anyone else could possibly do that? Well Stephen did it not too long after Jesus (Acts 7:60).
(2)Love is kind. When my wife and I were dating, we did a study on this chapter. I admitted to her that “love is kind” seemed pretty lame. She responded, “The reason I started dating you was mainly because I knew that you were kind.” I was shocked. From a dating perspective telling me that I’m “kind” is like telling me I’m a “nice guy.” That’s the death blow. The relationship is over. We’re relegated to just-friends (which 99.9% of the time means we won’t be seeing each other again). However, “kind” is far more than a superficial word we often use to describe an okay person that we don’t know much about. One of the phrases I like from Dictionary.com is that “kind implies a deep-seated characteristic shown either habitually or on occasion by considerate behavior.” My future-wife was willing to take the chance of going out on a date with me primarily because she new that my disposition was rooted in kindness. Looking at it from that perspective, my wife is brilliant (+5 brownie points with the missus) because kindness is the basic foundation of love.
(3)Love does not envy, (4) it does not boast, (5) it is not proud. This set deals with our impressions of ourselves as compared to others. Do I want what you have? Do I feel better about myself that I have something that you don’t? By comparing my status with yours, either I’m stunting my growth or I’m stunting yours. Love wants the best for everyone involved. The best way to grow in love is first to rely on those people that love you to help you grow. The Holy Spirit is here to help you in all things so look to Him first. God has also placed experienced Christians in your life to lead your way. Look to them too. The second step in growing in love is to help out others that need you. Find those people less experience than you and teach them what you know. We learn both from being taught and teaching others.
If you start using the word "kind" as your highest form of praise to increase it's rep (such as, "Dude, that 720 Gazelle Flip was totally KIND!"):
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